Whoa Woe Europe

Have done precious little today except for random 'classified as admin' work. Searched for hostels in venice, innsbruck and salzburg and navigated through unpronouncable names and impenetrable locations. I dread being recognized for what I truly am, when I finally get there. And before I go any further, I am taking a budget vacation across Europe-London, Paris, Rome, Venice, Florence, Pisa, Innsbruck, Salzburg & Munich. (No. not with my significant other. Why-coz he has work to do. Who with then- a close friend. No she's not in singapore. She's an Indian doing her PhD in the US. No. Im not gay.Yet)
Now that I've answered the unasked and hitherto unanswered questions, time to start describing my woes. We want to see the world on a shoe-string budget. Nothing wrong with that-except that decision leaves you wandering in the maze called "hostels".
I think the primary problem is that there is just so much information-Rough Guide, Lonely planet, gomio.com, hostels.com, hostelineurope.com.... and that's just the tip of the iceberg. Info overload just acquired a mighty ominous dimension. All I wanted was a glamorous sounding, scenic, backpacking vacation-why, just why, didnt anyone tell me about all the work involved in getting there!!
All hostels by rule, have and equal measure of both good and bad reviews, which just confuses the hell out of you or leaves you with no choice! Everything's good and everything's bad. This one has complaints about the bed, the security sucks at this place, this one has curfews, this one is too noisy. References are only a tad better. It just seems to boil down to putting your money where your karmic circle ends and breathe and wait for the trade-off to play out during your stay.
Im an Indian and I need a visa to go anyplace worthwhile on this planet, other than des of course :P The UK ppl want me to give them all possible details to assure them that i do have money to take care of myself in the 4 days that i'm there. So after 2 trips to the application centre and the biometric test & loads of dollars later, my application has been submitted. "if all goes well", i should get my visa by the end of this week/ Monday. After which comes the next step of the Schengen visa (im beginning to believe its a spelling & pronunciation conspiracy- Pray for me. And save some for next week.